99to1

It's 2005, I think the running count for lives lost to the Asian Tsunimi is now over 125,000. I find it hard to even imagine.

My prayers are for all those who are suffering, especially for those directly affected by this disaster.

I can't help but thinking if some of the difficulty I've had sleeping is related to the spiritual unrest this tsunami has created, the drastic and immeadiate shift it's brought to the world's level of suffering.

May all beings be free from sorrow, and the causes of sorrow.

We're back safely from the inlaws, we spent Wednesday through Saturday with them. The trip back was dry and the drive was fantastic, perhaps we even made record time.

We watched Frank Sinatra duets with Bill and Doreen on Detroit Public Television on New Year's eve. We shared a bottle of bubbly and listened to Frank, Doreen was is really good spirits.

Being in Ontario we took advantage of the LCBO. In Quebec the SAQ has been on strike since before the holidays. We brought back some read and some white wines.

Loren and I have been using the neti pot I gave her for christmas. Jala Neti is wonderful, I'm going to make this a daily thing.

The first day of the new year saw the return of a 10 minute seated meditation (I was also trying out the timer on my new watch).

I've decided to flip my discipline upside-down. From now on I'll be sitting every morning, and then doing my principal asana practice in the afternoon when I get home from work. I might even compliment morning sit with surya namaskaras if I have the energy.

I'd like to get the enlargments done and framed to bring to Darby's new shala, and get in a practice or two there before the end of January.

Speaking of working in a couple of visits with an ashtanga teacher; Gigi, from Jessy's health food in the Point Claire Vilage, is pushing a new internetional Ashtanga teacher to the montreal scene. His name is Itay, and apparently he's from Israel and has practiced at ayri. I'd like to check out his class, and perhaps use one his classes in the west island to introduce some of my yogi-curious colleagues to the practice...I wonder if Doug has been using the Nicki Doane dvd to help memorize the sun sals...we'll see...

I did portraits at Pop's place christmas day. One by one I brought each person into the kitchen after dinner and did a very simple documentary-style photo of them each. Might bring the Indian negatives with me to the lab this week when I bring the 120 black and white rolls on Wednesday.

Just back from a visit with Pop right now (I forgot my polaroid film back there christmas day), Loren is in bed with a headache and is calling...

Soon off to 295 for my first asana practice of 2005...

Apparently Loren and I are engaged now.
Sort of a quirky story involving my Mother's engagement ring, dinner at my cousin Donalds, and an almost accidental backward announcemnt to Loren's parents that we are engaged...
Well I did actually ask her to marry me...and...well...
It would be wonderful to get married.

Do I ever ache...a good ache though.
I feel all the organs in my body singing, or crying out for attention from the postures I performed last night.

Lets see...it's been probably half of a year since I have been doing any asana at a brisk pace, except for my month in Bangalore with Sharmila.

Last night I did half-primary, to navasana. I played along to the audio portion of David Swenson's primary serise video (tv off).

Oh my...

Well, I've gained perhaps 15-18 pounds since my return from India.
For a while I was wondering if I was going through some sort of shock-survival based binge. For one month I ate so little and saw people who were so poor and who had so little, that I had this tremendous, almost uncontrolable apetite. It's hard to say what I was going through with all that logieness and lethargy that struck me.

You know it's a lot harder to lift up and to jump back when you are so much heavier...go figure.

Time to resume better eating paterns, and a regular asana practice for sure. Tonight will see sun salutations and fundamental postures. Might even revisit fundamental postures twice to try to re-establish some confort in them.

In almost four years of sort-of-regular practice I've remained at a beginner's level. Now it feels like I'm experiencing the postures for the first time all over again. In an odd way I'm reliving the joy of discovering ashtanga. What bliss!

Tomorrow must remember to book with Karen, and Hilary for my first visits of 2005.

High above through veils of cloud I look on you again You're beautiful as always in this light

About you shame and ignorance are clinging like a shroud
But I can't wait to be with you tonight

Was in a wonderful space last night, with Shriekback's Sacred City as the soundtrack, it was blissful. Just after asana and beore meditation, it is an unssual album to have put on at that point but it certainly worked.

Did just one pass at the fundamental postures.

One of the most beautiful and strange dreams ever.
Simply devine really.
It involved a kind of rescue...
I assisted the escape of the most beautiful woman from some sort of tower structure. And from her own devices.

It felt like a reunion.

Skipped out on the early home routine to have a visit with Joe. Joe is great, it's been quite a while since we've seen each other. Loren and I have passed on at least 2 invitations to see him in his new house, and neither Joe, or I really could pinpoint when we were last together.

His house is HUGE. He's done some nice work setting it up so that it suits his lifestyle. 2 Home-based offices, sprawling kitchen, bedroom with embeded micro livingroom, huge basement livingroom with very big tv (we watched first 2 periods of Canada/Russia gold medal game after dinner) mini workout room including two massage tables etc..

We went out for dinner at his favorite Indian spot. Very good food indeed, masala dosha, vegetable chapatti, ochra, and lamb...yum yum.

He opened a very expensive bottle of scotch for drinks at his place...Joe is not a scotch drinker...I think he was under the impression that if the bottle cost so much, that it would be the best in the world, and that finally he would like scotch.

Well it certainly was tasty, though I don't think he enjoyed it any better than any other scotch he's tried before.

It was good to be in his company again. About four years ago we spent 6 months working together in Toronto, and we spent a lot of time together then. Last night reminded me of those times.

Joe is a mystery, being in his comapny is like being in the company of a lost God. He's benevolent powerful clear and brilliant, and at the same time sort of helpless, selfesh and muddied.

Though I always marvel in wonder when I spend time with him.

So I skipped out on asana practice, but I did manage to sit, both last night and this morning. I am still aching from my recent re-introduction to surya namaskar, and standing postures. Hamstrings are very alive these days.

I woke early, remembered to pack the rented flash gear, and to grab my India photos this morning. I stopped in for breakfast at Eggspectations in old montreal before the photo shop opened. Had my usual; the eggchilada, with a tall glass of fresh-squeezed grapefruit juice.

It turns out that I had removed the negatives from the package with the India photos. So despite remembering to bring them to the lab to get enlargements to give to Darby, I will not have them anytime soon, as I now have to remember where I filed them, and I use the term filed very loosely...

However by weeks end I should have the contact sheets of the black-and-white photos I took at Pop's place. I have visions of setting up a makeshift darkroom to produce really big prints from them, if I like the results. I should call the lab to price having the negs scanned...

I still have not written them a card, or a letter.

I was very rarely in touch then before my mother died, They lived just over the Quebec/Ontario boarder which added to the infrequency of our visits. It was during my mother's cancer treatment that Gary and I got to know each other. The Montreal/Ottawa/Alexandria days.

After Mum passed, Gary had his life in Ontario, and we didn't see much of him. Nan and Pop woiuld see him most when he would drive in. Then it got a little difficult for him to visit Montreal becaause he had gotten together with Barbara, it made Nan quite uncomfortable.

Then comes Gary's cancer diagnosis...
And his marriage to Barbara...
And his interferon/radiation treatments...

In my mind and heart, I've started writing to them, but not in the real world...

Loren suggested that I call them last night (she has been regularly suggesting it for some time now)...I finally did...and it was a very good idea. We had a wonderful talk. Barbara's daughter Alison (from previos marriage) gave birth, and Barbara's mother passed away all within 18 hours, on Christmas eve, or Christmas day.

Gary's in the middle of his treatment and Barbara has gone through those family biths and deaths...
I can not begin to imagine what they are going though.
I was very touched by their stories, their courage and their faith.

I am very thankful that Loren kept on me to contact them.

For asana practice.
I think I can maintain at least the same level of practice, and my early morning departure if I continue to practice in the afternoon/evening. In fact if I focus on a more inward schedule during the week (no late dinners out etc.) I can probably quite easily increase the asana activity.

It's interesting to begin, and end the day with seated meditation. Psychologically the two sessions seem very close together...like minutes apart...

Fern turned 83 yesterday.
Loren brought her these flowers.

At the window this morning...
"Yeah she's cute...needs about a year in the sun though..."

With Hilary and Mel.
Loren and I are storing some stuff for them and they stayed a while, we all tea and cookies had a good time.

I showed Hilary some of the photos I scanned from my family's 35mm slide collection. Aahh the 70's Here's a quick sampling:

Glen (her son)

Jill (my sister)

Mum (Hilary's sister)

Loren sent me an article written about Laurie Anderson and her show The End of the Moon.

"Who taught you what beauty is?"

And then I found this.

Monday the 10th was our 176th new noon. We decided to celebrate with a dinner on the Friday.
I wonder if we'll plan our wedding day on a moon?

I prepared a nice dinner for us; lambchops, shrimp, asparagus, and a side of pasta. We openned a bottle of wine which we've been keeping for about 2 years now. Al gave it to me either as a birthday, or christmas present. It was a 1997 Barolo, and a very nice treat as we do not buy such fanncy (expensive) wines for ourselves.

Lots of rest over the weekend, and lots of kitchen cleaning too. During the 2nd load of the dishwasher I triggered another back spasm. Now I'm all crooked again.

What did I expect?? Since coming back from India I've probably gained close to 20 pounds, and have not maintained my regular asana practice. Time to get it back...for real.

I will treat it like I did in India...just do the sun-sals until everything clears up. I did that a bit yesterday, though didn't follow through enough...tonight.

Might soon start playing music with Mathew.
It'll be an honour to jam with someone so talented.
(and who has so much gear)
Drums and keyboard...looking forward to getting the creative jucies flowing.
He's got one gig left to play with his old band, and then we're going to try to come up with something original...can't wait.

Is getting better, three days now of being able to do surya namaskar. The spasm is subsiding and I'm starting to feel normal again. Still a bit wobbly coming into and out of the first/last postion...can feel the muscles in my lower back around the spasm kinda firing and mis-firing trying to figure out who should be doing the work...

I should know better...that's exactly what happens when I go without a regular practice for a while. It get worse when combined with over eating. I'm going to try to design a practice/eating plan for next holiday season, as I think this happened lst year as well right about the same time for the same reasons

Speaking of eating...just into my 2nd home-baked muffin with a cup of coffee. Loren used the last of the egg-nog soy milk in this batch. The egg-nog was a real miss but the muffins are g r e a t !

Mental note to self clean the muffin tray tonight

Have started taking her to 295 with me. She seems to be quite sad these days, when the household undergoes dramatic changes to our comings and goings it really affects her.

Also since we've had the sofas re-upholstered Luna has been relagated to floor space only as her territory. Luna used to have a spot on one corner of the (what was) the red sofa. She has been pretty good at coping, and Loren made her a special little spot on the floor with a foam cushoin and one of her dog-smelly carpets which she seems to understand is where we want her to consider her spot. It's even right close to where her spot was when she had sofa privillages.

Slowly though she's been violating the new sofa rules and elevating herself to sofa-princess heights.

So she now gets to come with me to 295 and share the space without rules while shes's there. Really she can have a spot on the bed. She seems to be quite a bit more lively. Yesterday though she couldn't manage the walk back home...it might have been the cold or the salt on the roads...I had to carry her back.

Luna

On Sofa

Is getting crazy again...
I'm prepping for an 8 week course.

Eight weeks...

09:-17:00 for 2 months...It'll be exhausting.
No travel this time...client comes to see us.

Saturday I used the audio from the John Scott dvd to do standing and finishing poses. Quite a vigorous session given how little asana I've been doing lately (and given how slowly I've been doing the little I have). Still had the strenght to go through the prasaritas with head on the floor, like I did with Sharmila. Muscles in front of shin were in need of waking up again.

Gaining 18lbs (or so) will compound with the loss of strength from not maitaining a regular practice for 3 months; and make for a very tough practice indeed.

I reccomend it to anone who wants more of a "work out" from thier asana routine.

Will be doing this routine daily for a while. I like Scott's calling of the poses, as he calls with proper vinyasa count, and drishti.

New routine...
15 minutes at night on block.
10 minutes in the morning on bloster (the one Loren got me for christmas).

Though it's not really sitting, in the am I've added 10 minutes draped over the bolster for some gentle spine softening. Perhaps I might gain some benefit from the stimulation of a backbend in the morning (it might keep me from needing to slide back off to sleep).

Carried Luna accross the boulevard this morning so her paws don't get the salt reaction. Will stop by the pet store this afternoon to see if they've got those dog-booties.

Was HUGE is the sky this morning. I'm very surprised that my calendar has tomorrow down as the full moon. It lit up my sitting room this morning, it was incredibly bright.

Everybody seems to be sick
Loren
Heather
Hilary
Al
Astra
Cecile
Gilles
Charles
Jean-Denis
The list goes on...

So I'm not even 40 years old, and time is passing so quickly.
Weeks pass like days. Sometimes I thinks it's partly to do with my work environment...sometimes not at all.

Loren is still sick 4 days now...still not back to a full solds routine...hopefully today see a big change.

Haven't seen Rick and Cecile in a long time. Spent last night visiting with them...well...it was really a visit with Rick. Ceclie has been sick for four weeks now. She did try to sit with us for a while, but clearly she was uncomfortable. Rick and I had some Californian wine and pate, and terrine. One was a a caribou/fig pate, very tasty.

It's been quite a while since I've been on my bike. My knee is almost healed up from the fall I had on my last ride of 2004. Gio and I are tentatively planning a ride this sunday. They're calling for between -6 and -15 (21 and 5) with winds at 5km/hr (3mph). -15 is our cut off point (with windchill). Looks like it'll be a close call.

About to enter into a long prep/training period. Course will be 8 weeks, and my prep is already behind, as we still aren't getting regular time with the engineers in the production department.

That's all for the time being

For a bike ride in the snow.
Currently -12 will go up to -7 (~20F).
Gio, Drew and I are heading to Rougemont to see if the trail conditions are compatible...hope so. It could be a wonderful day. Rick couldn't make it...

Got a coffee to finish...get dressed for riding...and change some tires...pack the extra clothes for the trail...and maybe the portable coffee/kitchen gear and we're off.

They'll be here in about an hour...gotta get crackin...might even bring the camera...though Loren left the digital elsewhere and my 35mm gear is very heavy...not trail friendly with all the extra stuff we cart along.

Might be the first ride of 2005

That's how Drew summed up the snow ride yesterday.
The weather was ideal, but the trail conditions were not. We ended up being able to ride the fire road only, as there had been enough atv traffic to compact the snow into a ridable layer. Still it was real tough going.

Typical or traditional cycling training theory says you should only start on hill rides after you have pedalled around 2000km on flat terrain, it's called your base. Well suffice it to say we were riding hills a little too early yesterday.

The fresh snow had this kind of squishy squeak, or scruntch as you rolled over it. It was very hard to get the bike moving and once you were momentum-bound it was even harder to maintain enough effort (not to mention steering control) to keep with an ongoing forward moving action. Quite a workout indeed.

I experienced a lot of cramping in my hands and forearms. My fingers wanted to maintain a full on grip on the brakes once we had pointed the bikes back downhill. this was from all the tension that had been forced into them gripping the bars on the way up. Less coffee; more electrolites???

Speaking of coffee, we finished off the ride with coffee (fresh brewed lattes) cake and a little snort of scotch (to give a little warming effect).

We didn't make it to the top of the access road to reach the summit of Rougemont, but we were close to 2/3 or maybe 3/4 of the way up. I'd like to say next time...though I know I won't want to climb that road until I have a much more established base. And that won't be for quite a while yet.

2005 is off to a good start for cycling as we got in our first outdoor ride in January. 8 week couse brings me to the end of April, if I ride the rollers and keep on with some level of outdoor riding I might get fit for the summer riding.

Might take a while to get the photos...used the 35mm camera and didn't finish the roll...