Road To Mysore

Last Wednesday, I sent an email to my boss. He was in Tamil Nadu with another Tax Partner. They were very impressed with the office of another US CPA firm in India. He basically said that our firm will be opening an office in India and will be sending people from the LA office to train the India employees in early January. Unfortunately, I may not get involved in this process...oh well. I was initially disappointed when I got the news but for some reason I felt that it was not meant to be. There is a part of me that wants to get involved but there is another part of me that knows it's not my destiny. I know it has a lot to do with me terminating my status as an employee. They would rather have someone they can control...that's just the way it is. I know that it's time for me to start opening new doors but for that to happen I must close old doors.

A few days a go, Elle came over and made me some Thai food...vegetable green curry. It was such a treat. I cooked a mixture of black jasmine rice and brown rice to go with it. I have to say that Thai food is my favorite food. I was in food heaven.

Last night, Mirjana and I met up with Shoaib and his friends in a bar called High Octane. I was pretty impressed with the way the bar was set-up. It was nicely decorated. Shoaib had 5 European women with him...what a stud. I had a good time chatting with Shoaib's friends. We danced a bit. I wanted to dance more but Mirjana and I were not feeling the music.

At around 10:30PM, we left the bar and took a scooter ride to the city. The city is so different late at night. It's so quiet and peaceful. We went along the Mysore palace, KRS circle and up Devarajas road. It was a good way to end the evening.

Today I went to the shala to pay for my second month...time flies. It's hard to believe that my first month is already over. I spoke to Saraswati and she told that when I pay for my third month, I will get credit for the two weeks in which the shala will close. That will work perfectly with my schedule because my third month will coincide with around the time I will leave. I may extend my stay a by or two so that I will leave on my last day at the shala. I also plan to extend my trip by a week so that I will arrive in LA on the first week of February. I am not looking forward to going back to work.

This is the first time I've been in India where in the US dollar is pretty low. I thought I left with a lot of money but I can see my bank balance shrinking faster than anticipate...that sucks. I need to watch what I spending from here on. I know I have enough but not as much as I had anticipated. Normally when I've been in India it's been about 43 to 45 rupees per dollar. It's currently around 38 rupees to a dollar.

I've noticed that everyday I see regular students arriving. All of them are staying through February or March. The word on the street is that more of the old/regular students are arriving between now and December. Those that normally come in January are arriving a month or so before to secure a spot in the shala and avoid the chaos. I predict by the first week of December, the shala will be full and anyone arriving in January will be practicing after 6AM. It will be interesting to see what will happen in mid-January. Tina told me that last January and February, they were still serving breakfast until 1PM. I'm going to witness only a small part of the chaos and can easily avoid that because I'll be out of the shala before 7AM. It will be fun though to see some of my old friends.

I woke up at around 9:30 this morning. I don't remember the last time I've slept in this late. Normally on moondays and Saturdays I would still wake up before 7AM. I'm a morning person.

Last night, I met up with some friends and went dancing at High Octane. It was hip hop night. We danced till it closed at 11PM and heading to the Metropole for a late night snack. I ended up getting home at around 1AM. I'm normally asleep at 9PM so I was way past my bedtime. I need more nights like this.

This trip has been an unsual one in very many different levels. I'm not sure I even know how to express myself at the moment. I think the title of this blog entry explains everything. I expected a lot of things in this trip that never happen but there are a lot of things that have happened which I never expected. I am constantly surprising myself. I know I'm being very vague but I'm not sure how or if I will ever be able to express what I'm going through now.

For starters, a lot of the people I thought I would be spending time with in Mysore have decided to keep to themselves. I'm connecting more time with people whom I least expect. Most of my crew are going to arrive in December and January but now I doubt I may spend that much time with them. Last year I arrived with a built in group of friends. I didn't even bother to reach out to other people. This year, I tried to reconnect with those that I already know but it didn't seem very natural.

Just recently, I've met a group of people who don't even practice yoga. The connection has been effortless. It's surprising because we're different in very many ways but in escense we're the same. I don't know it that makes any sense. The fact that they don't practice yoga has been a breath of fresh air. I'm tired of talking about yoga and that's what you tend to do when you're hanging out with the shala people...especially the new ones. I don't know where these friendships are heading...honestly, I don't want to know. All I know is that when I'm with them, I'm living in the present and the future is not important.

My friends asked me a few days ago what my age was. I told them the truth. They all said, "Noooo!!!" They decided that I was 28. They refuse to accept my real age for whatever reason. I decided not to argue with them so from now on, I'm 28. I figured that I could either tell the truth and be called a liar or tell a lie and not be called a liar. I'm choosing the latter.

I was hoping to use my time here in Mysore to reflect on where I want to go and what I want to do with my carreer/life. I thought that once I was here and I could gather all the information I need, plot my strategy and carve my own path. At the moment, I don't want to do any of that. I simply don't care about my carreer. I don't know why but my carreer at the moment is so boring and unimportant. Why would I want to spend my energy figuring how I can make more money or be more successful when I can spend my time doing nothing and being nothing...I'm tired of chasing, let the chips fall where ever it wants to fall. In the bigger picture, it doesn't really matter. If I can find peace at this very moment then why should anything else matter. I've learned that whenever I jump, I will always land with my two feet.

When I left Los Angeles over a month ago, I told myself that I would work hard to get my yoga practice to where it once was. Ironically, I didn't have to work hard to get it back...it was always there. All I needed to do was to let go of all the burden I was carrying. I can't even figure out why I was carrying it in the first place. It's amazing how much crap is placed on our shoulders by society. We can either choose to carry it or just say "no". I wish I had said "no" more often.

Most days I wish that I knew what the future holds for me. Today, I'm happy not knowing.

Today I started a four day meditation class with Narasima. I've been wanting to do it cause I heard some good feedback from other. One of my friends told me that it's help her asana practice tremendously. The class start at 9AM. He request that each of us bring flowers, fruits and the white hankerchief for the puja. Why the white hankerchief? I don't know and I didn't bother to ask...maybe later.

The class started with a short puja in a very small puja. There were 8 student and we barely fit in that room. After that, we spoke to us one at a time and gave us a mantra to remember. I asked him if I was suppose to know what my mantra meant. He said "no" but I think he might tell at the end of course.

When we returned to the classroom, he let us fill out some forms. It was just basic questions like what we expected, if we had ever done any other meditation techniques and etc... Then he explained the techniques and let us apply it for 25 minutes. I was worried I would pass out because I normally take a nap at around this time. The meditation technique made me instantly relax and thank God it didn't put me to sleep. It was a very simple technique but had a strong impact on me. Time just flew by. I was absolutely at peace with myself. I'm supposed to practice the technique tonight before I sleep and tomorrow morning before heading to class. So far so good. I'm looking forward to class tomorrow.

I did my second meditation class today. I'm really enjoying the meditation technique I'm learning. I'm normally the type of person who cannot stay put. Since yesterday, I've practiced it 3 times alone and once more in class. It's really simple. We were all given mantras to repeat in our minds. He recommends that we should meditate for 20 minutes each time. The first time I did it alone, I did it for 20 minutes. The second I did it only for 19 minutes. That was because I kept thinking about not being late for class today. This evening, I did it for 25 minutes. He doesn't want us to meditate too long alone because we're beginners and we're not in a controlled enviroment. When he let's us meditate in class he is constantly watching us.

It may be too soon to speak on what kind of impact this meditation has on me but at the moment, I feel relax and at peace with myself. I want to include this to be part of my practice so I don't want to get overly excited. My mind is constantly going in a million direction, hopefully I can slow it down a bit.

I got an email from a friend of mine a few days ago. He asked me how this trip is different from all my prior trips. I think the most significant difference about this trip from other trips are the people I've been meeting and spending time with. There are generally three types of people you meet in Mysore...people who are passing through, acquaintances and people who would have a significant impact in your life, the true friendships. In priors trips I was lucky enough to make a lot of good friends who to this day I still keep in touch with. I could be wrong and it may be too early to say but most of the people I've met recently fall in the first two categories. There may be a handful of people I've recently met who may turn out to be one of the latter. At the moment, that remains to be seen...only time will tell. Experience has taught me not to expect too much.

Today was our the last day of our meditation class. I'm sad it's over. I really enjoyed the way Narasima explained everything. He makes it very simple and understandable. He never tries to use big words to try impress us. He is a simple and humble man. I think that's what makes him incredible. In contrast, a lot of western yoga teachers like to talk big, act like they're enlightened and pretend they're humble but you can see through them...full of BS. He is a rare man, full of knowledge and never selfish.

Our class was suppose to end at 10AM but we all kept asking him questions...trying to squeeze every bit of wisdom. At some point you realize that it would take a lifetime to achieve that. He told us that in 15 days we would have a follow up/check up class. From here on in, it's up to use to maintain a daily meditation practice...20 minutes in the morning and 20 minutes in the evening. I'm confident I could do it.

Last night I went to Elena's for dinner. I arrived an hour early so I could help and watch her make the pasta sauce. Ever since Gabriele made pasta for me last year, I've been obsesed with pasta. What can I say...these Italians, when it comes to pasta...they're amazing. I help her cut the vegetable and watched diligently. I can't believe how simple it was. She gave me a few tips on how to enhance the flavor of the meal. I told her, "I can do this." She replied with her Italian accent (love that accent by the way), "Of course you can!!!" I stuffed myself last night...yummm...very simple but amazing. There is nothing like a homemade Italian meal.

Jillian told me during dinner last night, "Your like a food magnet. Where there is good food, your there." I smile but couldn't say anything...it was true.

The past few days, I've been regularly walking around the lake. I noticed that there are more birds and a larger variety. I particularly like the eagles that glide by so effortless. On those long walks, I've reflected on what I really want to do with my life. When I first came to Mysore, I promised myself that I would come every year for the next five years. Next year will be my 5th year and as much as I would like to come every year for the rest of my life, there is more out there that I want to experience.

Recently, I've been spending a lot of time with various Europeans...they facinate me. My trip to Rome this year was my first trip to Europe...I loved it and want more. I know at some point I want to spend a substantial time in Europe the way I spend time here Mysore. Not just travelling around but staying in a city for 3 to 6 months at a time. I spoke to Elena about it last night. See gave me some insights. I know it won't happen next year because it's still Mysore in 2008 but in the next 2 to 3 years, I want head to Europe and stay there indefinitely. I don't know exactly what I'm going to do. All I know is that at some point, I'm going to say, "f@#k it, Europe here I come." Pick up whatever odd job I can get, move from one country to another, learn one language after another and immerse myself. I know it can be done. I need find the courage to do it. I also need to figure out what I need to give up/let go to make it happen...Europe 2009!!!

Maintaining a daily meditation practice has not been as easy as I had expected. It’s easy to get distracted and finding the time is sometimes tricky. So far I’ve been consistent. I hope to keep it up and make it a part of me. I’m already feeling the benefits. I’m much calmer and few things seem to bother me. Narasima did warn us that we will hit some plateaus and encouraged us to keep going. It’s part of the whole practice, just like the asana practice.

I’ve finally started the process of planning my trip to Rajasthan. The more I read about the places to see and things to do the more anxious I am to leave. I’ve been told by a lot of friends that it’s an amazing place. The 3 weeks I have pegged to go will barely scratch the surface. I will probably leave the day the shala closes on December 14 and return on January 4 or 5, before the shala reopens. I was hoping to convince some friends to travel with me but most of them are heading to Goa…been there, done that…nothing to be excited about. I think I will end up traveling, alone which is fine, but it would be more fun to travel with someone…oh well.

The shala is starting to fill up. There seems to be 2 to 4 new faces arriving each day…let me take that back, mostly old faces are arriving each day and a few new faces. It’s great to see some of them.

Yesterday, Sharmila (Sharath’s sister) showed up. She assisted Saraswati in the led class. It was nice to see her. I had the chance to chat with her a bit. I got to know her well last year when we rode the train together from Bangalore to Mysore. She was instrumental in making our Bollywood dance happen last year. I asked her if she was going to help her mom in the next 3 weeks. She said she was only here for the weekend and that she couldn’t leave her own classes in Bangalore. She will be visiting Mysore as often as possible to visit Guruji and help her mom.

So what do you do a lazy Sunday afternoon in Mysore...bake a chocolate banana cake...

A few days ago I had breakfast with Pam and Jake. I asked Jake if he can bake me the cake he did last weekend. He said, "no problem" but Pam said, "why don't you make it yourself. we'll give you the base recipe and you can throw in what ever you want it in." Pam planted the seed in my head and in the next days that followed I kept thinking about my cake. I use to bake a gazellion years ago but I no longer have any of my recipes.

This morning Jake gave me his base recipe and suggested that I throw this and that. He said he never bakes the same thing because he never measures and throws in whatever he feels like. He knows what the consistency would be and when he got there, he would just pop it in the oven. I'm a familiar with the consistency so I thought...what the heck...

This afternoon, I gathered all the ingredients. I decided to throw in chocolate, coconut powder, flax seeds and cinnamon. I had to throw in the cinnamon because after going to 3 different stores I found it. It's easy to get cinnamon sticks here but apparently they don't use it in powder form. I was a little worried about how is would come out since I haven't bake in a long time and my kitchen equipment is a little primitive. I told Shoba, my landlady that if it came out well, I would bring her a few pieces. If you don't get any then you know what happened. So let me tell you how it came out...tumba chana gee-de!!!

Tomorrow...coconut oatmeal raisin cookies....

I spent the last few days checking for the best airline ticket I could get from my trip to Jaipur. In previous years, I would just go to Air Deccan's website and book it online. I tired to get it from them again this year since they had the best price but the website would just freeze. I finally spoke to Ganesh and he told me that Air Deccan is no longer allowing anyone with a foreign Visa or Mastercard purchase a ticket. It's their way of telling foreigners that we have to go to the travel agent and pay more...that sucks. I was hoping to get a ticket for under 8,000 rupees but the best price on-line was on Air Deccan for 9,000 rupees. I called the travel agent and they told me that their best price was 10,000 rupees. That's just great...I have to pay an extra 1,000 rupees for being a foreigner.

I spent most of the day trying to decide on whether I should still go to Rajasthan or maybe some place closer. It's peak season in Rajasthan at the moment so I expect the hotels to be more expensive too. The fact that the dollar is so weak has not helped me. I thought about doing a Vipassana in Mumbai instead. A couple of friends were just there and they loved it. The flights to Mumbai are much cheaper too and the Vipassana is by donation. Kerela was another option too. I even thought about taking the train instead but I don't think I'd enjoy sitting on a train for two days. In the end I gave in and paid the 10,000 rupees for the ticket to Jaipur...ouch!!!

A few days ago the memory of a little girl came up. In begining, I couldn't figure out why I even thought about her. I must have been around 4 or 5 years old when I knew her. She was my neighbor and according to my parents we played together. I don't have any memory of us playing together but I remember seeing a picture of the two of us together years later. I remember being told that she was my beautiful "girlfriend"...for God's sake, I was only 4 or 5 years old. The only other memory I have of her is that one day I was told that she drowned in swimming pool in their house and died. At that age I didn't even know what death was all about.

I've been trying to maintain my daily meditation practice. I've only miss one morning practice and one evening practice since our last class. There are days when doing the 20 minutes or more is easy and there are days when I barely make it...oh well. My mind is a lot more quiet now than when I first start. Various thoughts and memories are slowly starting to surface. Being left alone with my thoughts is not so bad. I've been spending a lot of time alone too. It's also helped me be more focus during my asana practice. I don't know where this meditation practice will lead to but I hope to keep it.

I've come to realize that my perception of was is beautiful was planted in my mind at a very very young age. I wonder what other memories would surface...