Tartan Yogi

I had an amazing practice on Monday, I even spent about 10 minutes doing leg behind the head and yoga nidrasana just because it felt so good, my hips seem to have opened probably after the teacher training weekend and all the Ana Forrest work. I even managed garbha pindasana without water to help get the arms through. My headstand sucked though so it is my Christmas aim to increase my duration in it so I don't get mocked.

And I haven't had time to practice since then as it is madness at work and also trying to get a dress for the work Christmas do tomorrow, buy and wrap all the Christmas presents for everyone and do all the Christmas cards and have about 4 work lunches and a trip to Oxford observe some yoga classes and also finish my yoga essay so I can get my certificate. Eeek, no wonder I am going mad.

Although I have now finished the Christmas shopping which is a big relief. The two present rule has actually made it more difficult I think and probably not that much cheaper. The problem is my mother as she insisted on having a two present rule (everyone gets two presents for everyone else) and then she broke the rule instantly so everyone else tries to compensate by getting bigger presents. I think she must be making up for the impoverished Christmases when she was little, but it really is a bit overwhelming. I suppose it is because Christmas is a big deal for our family as we don't really do presents for birthdays so this is like a big yearly love-in! I do love it all really, it is just the stressful bit organising everything that I find, erm, stressful!

I did some yoga observation at a beginners class on Monday too after my own practice which was really interesting. I was helping to demonstrate some poses and ujjai breathing. I suppose it is more assisting than observing which is brilliant. I might ask the teacher (who has been so brilliant to let me do all this) if I can carry on helping as I enjoy it so much and it will help with my nerves. It is so daunting standing at the front of a class instead of in it. Although the teacher mentioned he would get me to teach some poses which is great, but scary! I am going to practice on my whole family over Christmas so I feel prepared for that!

The thing about teaching which is my downfall is nerves really. I definitely need to work on it and assisting really helps and so will some practice on people I know who are beginners so I can get the language right. Man, you think after the practice we had during the course I would be used to it. And I do presentations at work all the time so I should really be OK. I think the difference is that I really care that I explain everything correctly in a yoga class! I am probably thinking about it too much and working myself up into a frenzy as usual. Which is probably why I didn't do any observation yesterday when I said I might. I need to work myself up to actually teaching in a real class!

I suppose I need to find my teaching voice, if you know what I mean. I think I know what it is, it is just actually having the confidence to begin. Once I have done that I think I will be fine.

I stayed at a friend's last night and the room I was sleeping in had the deepest, thickest carpet in the world. So naturally I immediately did about four headstands in a row to practice coming up with straight legs and it was really easy. Maybe I need more padding for my head when doing it at the yoga centre. And it might explain why I can do headstands no bother at home on the carpet, but have a problem on the bamboo floor of the yoga centre.

In other news it is the work Christmas do tonight. I have bought A Dress and everything. It is a very 50s style number, a black shirt dress with a calf length swingy skirt and high collar. Even more excellent is the fact I got a 10% discount on it because a button was missing.

The only problem with Christmas do's though is that everyone gets so drunk and being the pure yogini type (hahahahahah!) I don't really want to drink that much. I may try and leave earlyish so to avoid the cringies - you know the morning after when you had to much to drink and talked rubbish all night...

I just received and read (very quickly as it was so interesting) the Donna Fahri book 'Teaching Yoga: Ethics & the teacher-student relationship'. It is fantastic. Really interesting for anyone thinking about yoga teaching or has done teacher training recently like I have. I love her straightforward approach and also the emphasis on practical aspects of teaching like making sure you create effective boundaries with your students. She is very interested in the ethics of teaching for example should you become friends with your students.

It has made me think about the way I conduct myself when I am being taught and in general it has emphasised that I take on the responsibility for my yoga practice rather than overly relying on a teacher. I suppose this is reflected by the fact that I am taught by three main teachers. Although they are all teaching ashtanga.

It also makes me realise that when beginner students ask me questions I have to be honest about what I do and do not know. I am just a beginner teacher and I don't know it all, probably never will! But I do know a bit and that is what I will teach and hopefully well.

So everyone at work is winding up for Christmas and as a result my e-mail inbox has been pretty quiet today. I don't like it when it is quiet, perversley. It confuses me as I worry I am not doing enough. I am making an effort to enjoy it though, I will be much happier when I am on holiday and can devote myself to relaxing, doing some nice home practices and seeing my family. It is times like Christmas when I realise how fast my life goes normally, it is good thing to slow down, a very good thing.

Which I still haven't watched yet this year, why Christmas can't have started yet ;)

However on the up side I did dye my hair blue last night (actually black with a hint of blue, but blue sounds more exciting!) and have finished my packing for Christmas and New Year and all the presents are wrapped. All I need to do is finish work and then I am on holiday until the 8th January, hooray!

Managed one practice this week, but will get the chance to do lots next week when I am at my parents overlooking the sea. Hopefully it will be very relaxing and I am not beating myself up about not practicing for a few days at this time of year.

It has been a monumental yoga year this year with teacher training, getting on to second series and workshops with Ana Forrest and Dharma Mittra. Hopefully next year I will get cracking with more class observation and finishing my last essay so I get my certificate and then possibly even some teaching. Ideally I will do some assisting as well if anyone will let me.

My aim for practice over the holidays is to at least do the sun sals every day and also to practice headstands to extend my duration in them and also to see if I can get further on in hanumanasana, just for fun!

So Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to all the ashtangis out there, may all your jump throughs be good ones!