Chatvari

not really. i ended my well intentioned fast last night after work almost by accident. i say that to mean that i was on auto pilot when i opened the fridge, grabbed the most delicious oil cured morrocan olives from the "Whole Paycheck" olive bar and went for some crakers along with it. up until the crakers part i had no conscience realization that i was not suppsed to be eating as i was fasting. once i grabbed the crakers i came to and in a phrase said...screw this shit Im STARVING!

so i ate more olives than i care to mention and quarter box of stoned wheat thins and i feel fantastic about the decision. strange because i wasnt weak or exhausted from not eating, i felt fine in fact. but mentally there was some ritual that i had left out for the past couple of days and the loss of that was more then i could bear. it didnt help that in a meeting yesterday an entire basket of baked goodies were sat directly in front of me. all sorts of cookies and brownies and chocolate covered strawberries. ughhh. thats my weak spot ,sweets i love em. if anything it was this that did me in. i couldnt get my mind off them for the rest of the day.

i dont know what if anything i accomplised with a two day fast, other than perhaps a realization that most of my "hunger" is mental as opposed to physical. which in itself is a pretty good lesson. it makes the idea of 1/2 for food 1/4 for liquid and 1/4 for air seem much more accessible. tonight im going to make a kitchari of sorts wth lentils, rice and hominy...yum!