there is some serious unnecessary honking in NYC. I'm not just talking about intersections. I'm talking about when changing lanes, pregnant pauses on 4 way stops, at people crossing the intersection, at random cars parked along the street, the fedex/delivery guys, the list goes on and on...
and i have never seen a city as *to the point* as NYC. these people have the art of the one answer question down. this city is no fluff, no bs, it's a let's get to the point and take action type of town. i can see fear in their eyes if you try to make small talk:
"Noooo... don't talk to me, just freaking buy the gloves!"
it's like they dread the "midwestern shopper". all corn, beef and potatoes, too nice, *waaay* too friendly, all talk, unhurried (don't you know that *I* have a sales goal to make every hour? just effing buy something!) as *we* the midwestern shopper gaze, touch/mess up the pristine piles of clothing, ask too many questions, and chit chat like cows that are grazing on a field of insanely green lush grass. i know you dread *us*.
admit it.
i bet the worst job a new yorker could think of is probably the concierge desk. c'mon... stupid question after stupid question, rotating between inane requests and idiotic guests demanding the impossible. at the hudson, the concierge desk was as plesant as pulling teeth without anesthesia and as impersonal as going to the gyno. which was quite the change from the "W" in the financial district in chicago. i loved the concierge joseph!
let's not talk about the room. i knew 150 sq ft was tiny but NOT what i was expecting for 2 people. i'm used to being close to the lion but, holy hell this was like i was constantly up in his grill.
and then there's the food. i'm all about the food. i am a foodie. but, when is it acceptable to charge 6( x2) bucks for OJ and a 7 (x2) bucks for a side (yes a side = 4 pieces) of bacon? hmm.. never.
this bacon i had better have been from a heirloom pig from the greenmarket or something because i will be severely pissed if it was some store bought *oscar meyer* brand. and i see how you are, you sneaky hostess. give us the breakfast menu and not the full service brunch menu which would have the friggin' listings of your meat meals sides.
and to you mr. chinatown waiter... dude, you swiped my card. you have me paying for food. why must you insist on watching me sign my receipt? do you not want a tip? do you think i can't see you helicopter hovering around? aren't you like busy or something? because i would gladly keep my 6 buck tip and go to tenren for bobba.
ridiculous insanity.
alinea home of the 135 dollar meal i get. but 7 dollar bacon i don't get. is it me? am i weird? on second thought, don't answer that.
now one if by land, two if by sea was interesting. while we were buying the lion suit, our sales dude actually chit chatted with me. he had asked where we were going and i had said "one if". he was like dude that is THE place to propose in NYC. i was like "get out of here!" and he was like seriously, you will see guys dropping on their knees like flies proposing. the lion and i took that with a grain of salt. kind of like *ok whatever*. sure enough a dude proposed - not only that, i looked around a noticed that everyone's dessert had some sort of congratulations, happy birthday, happy anniversary, ect... spelled out on chocolate on their plates. it was the twilight zone of "celebrations". it was weird. really weird. so much for originality, i picked THE place where everyone and their mother celebrates an occasion like their baby's first poop. kind of like tomkat getting engaged on the eiffel tower.
*so, for the cheesy factor, i slipped my ring off and said "do it again! propose to me bay-by!"
*(ok, that was a lie. we behaved like adults. but it would have been funny!)
yes, yes, mission accomplished. we DID indeed buy the lion his suit. it's friggin' so hot, so fly, so bangin', so (ok.. i'm out of adjectives) that he will bust up in flames like peter patrelli on heroes. what i thought was the most hilarious was that the sales dude trying to upsell the shoes and the shirt. like we just dropped some serious cash and you want us to buy what? it's not like i can tell the difference between a brooks brother's french cuff shirt versus and armani shirt (that was 450...). not to mention that he failed to tell us that the jacket AND the pants were priced separately (not until the tailor did his markings...). oh ooops.. yeah a BIG ooops. nonetheless, it was bought. i sucked it up on my dress and the lion is sucking it up on the suit. which he will wear infinitely more times than my one (a really formal event) maybe two times (halloween?) i could wear my dress.
since the lion can't get his original ring made. it was going to look like the damani d-ring that mr b pitt had designed. and since we had tried on the ring at the damani store with no luck. (like really.. why engrave damani on the outside of the ring? that's just friggin tacky) we have to investigate men's wedding ring options. so here is the list:
the cartier trinity (large size i think is 5mm. we'd be doing it in pt/ the second pic is with a bit of bling. i think he'd want it large with the middle ring with that bit of bling):
the georg jensen (he likes the 4 stack with the bit of secret bling):
and the super secret bling:
